Being together

Hey there guys... Thanks for visiting my page and thanks for dropping comments on my previous posts. You guys out there have been really encouraging me to keep on blogging.

Recently, i have been drying out of idea of what to share. I don't really know what topic i can deliver this time but I've just got an inspiration for this post. It's about something that is very close to us but we seem not able to see it. It's about being together with others.

I've been traveling quite a lot to different kind of places. From my small, sweet hometown to the busy city lifestyle, i've been wondering to various kind of places. And one thing that i really enjoy the most when I am traveling is, guess what? The PEOPLE. Seriously, I don't know why I am born to be "talkative" person. I guess the only reason I can give now why I am a people-man is I cannot stand quietness and I really need to talk. Whenever it feels quiet, I always try to break it and start a conversation.

Anyway, I am not really a people-man, but some of my friends said that I am one. Some of my friends told me that I am a friendly man. I don't know how friendly I am but I am trying to be what i want to be, that is to be ME :)

Being together with people is the nature of human. I cannot imagine myself leaving on an island ALONE (just like Tom Hank in the movie "Cast Away"). We, humans love to live around people... but not with everyone in the world. You see, we are actually quite selective when we hang around with people or even our friends. We may feel more comfortable with one of our friends but not to the others. I also feel the same too. We feel more comfortable with somebody but not with somebody else. We can share more ideas, jokes and thoughts with that person but not with anybody else. I've been wondering why does this happen (of course, as a human). I figure it out and it actually finally comes to 2 word...

SIMILARITIES and SUITABILITY.

When we meet a person for the very first time, we find it is quite hard to start a conversation. We seem to be lost in the midst of finding ideas of what to talk about. This because we have not found the similarities between us and the person we just met. I know that is not true for everyone because some people just know how to start a conversation. But initially, they also find difficulty in starting a conversation.

Anyway, I am not going to blog about how to start a conversation. What I am going to point out here is what makes we feel more comfortable with a person but not to another person. It is actually back to our own principle of our life. We feel more comfortable speaking to a person who shares some similar traits with us. I always looked and observed people around me. They do talk to everyone but one thing that I observed is that, they will feel more comfortable when they talk to someone. They talk more comfortably with that person compared with the others. Humans are more comfortable when they found something that is familiar and similar to them. This also applied the same in our daily conversation. We feel more comfortable speaking with people who share the same styles and traits with us.

This is very dangerous because if we are going to stay like this, we will tend to be more selective in our conversation. This may lead to bias and "mistreated" and "misconception" towards another people. We share something with a person we feel comfortable with but not to the others. I know you may mention that we want to take care of another people's feelings but why through ignoring them? You may never know that they wanted to hear the same thing because you are ignoring them because they are not the same.

Anyway, we also need to trust in building relationship. As we have more trust with one fellow, we feel secure when we share our thoughts with that person. We feel more secure sharing what we feel and what we think with somebody that we trust. Thus, we will be able to eliminate the earlier problems that I've pointed out.

When somebody is suitable with us, we tend to turn to that person to talk with but not with others. We are able to share without hesitation with that person.
When you this, you are already ignoring some other people who might be a better person than the person that you already have. As you carry on, you will only laugh and cry with "this person" but not with the others. Then, this will limit the number of people that you are going to share your thought with. As it continue, only a small number of people will really know who you are.

There is nothing wrong of having a small number of people who now us better and whom we can share our thought with. But isn't it will be much better if we can share our thought with more people...
Isn't it will be much better if we can be good and nice to everyone...
Isn't it will be much better if we have lots of best friends instead of only one...

Think about it. Be universal (Thanks, Dad).